My wife, Linda, was diagnosed with ALS, Lou Gehrig’s disease, a neurological disorder, in August of 2021. She died November 12, 2023 at CHOMP Hospital in Monterey,CA. It happened in the wee hours, 2 AM. I was at her side but sleeping when the nurses woke me to tell me she had ‘passed’.

So now I’ve lost both my girls, my daughter Katie in 1992 at the age of seven months from a birth accident and now my wife and best friend. Hence the two layer cake. And the frosting? Dealing with the loss of both. They were my family.

So how to navigate the pain? Over the next few weeks I will be offering a few strategies and insights that have helped me. They won’t help everyone since Loss is unique not only to each individual but each Loss experienced is unique emotionally.

WHY is always the BIG question. For those who have deep faith in God and believe in a ‘plan’ that may be enough to answer the question but not necessarily to ease the hurt. With Linda, as with Katie, a verse from the Tao te Ching serves me well:

Nature does not play favorites, She regards her creations without sentimentality.

Simply, shit happens. This helped us with Katie and now me with Linda. It might not be for you but chew on it.